Tuesday, September 13, 2016

It Comes in Waves

There's this thing about grief; you can't fix it and your desire to have your person back never really goes away. I wish it were different for those that I now see reeling in the aftermath of death.  I wish I didn't know how they felt and I wish I could change it for them.  God doesn't want us to experience pain.  He never intended for us to experience grief.  That alone gives me comfort but it doesn't change that we feel it; every single emotion.  

We have a family in our community that has recently experienced the worst kind of pain.  Their entire life as they know it has changed.  They were forced into this club.  I wish I could close and lock the door to this club. I don't want another sweet soul to enter.  

But they do.  And I can do absolutely nothing to stop it.  In the place I am in I can't help but feel like I have some authority in the arena of grief.  Again, not because I particularly want to but because it happened to us and we had to embrace it.  So if you have someone in your life dealing with grief just sit with them.  I can't say it enough.  Listen to them, cry with them, sit with them.  They do not need or want anything.  Nothing is going to be able to rewrap their perfect gift that is now in shreds on the floor.  You need to know this as well, you will feel like it is not enough.  The person grieving will absolutely feel like it is not enough.  But it is all we have to give and it is enough to sustain them.  Believe that you and your desire to sit with them and listen to them is enough even when it doesn't feel like it.  

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