Friday, July 17, 2020

A Lesson After 6 Years

There is a huge misunderstanding that follows grieving people around (especially at the beginning of that journey). 

You think we don't want to hear about you and your people

Trust me when I say I want you to tell me about your people.  I want you to share the good and the bad about your kids and your families.  Tell me when they experience "firsts" that consequently change your life.  Share when they make you so mad you want to cry or scream or both.  Tell me how your little people are the same age that Charlie would be because I want to remember him too and dream about all the new things we would be experiencing everyday.  Laugh with me about the silly things your kids do and share the funny stories.  Tell me when you have absolutely had it and need a break because I will gladly go grab a margarita with you! 

I do not want you to ever stop yourself from saying something that seems insignificant compared to what others have walked through or what you know I have walked through.  I truly believe after walking through this grief and walking with others through small pieces of their grief journey that our grief and heartaches cannot be compared.  They are absolutely not meant to be compared.  I have said it before and I will say it again, "The worst lost is always yours."  We have to vow to sit in hard spaces with others when they are experiencing their hard moments and I am so thankful I have people that have done that for me over the past 6 years.  We need to make space for that.   

Charlie died 6 years ago today and I will never forget that day.  It makes me ache for him.  It makes me question so many things, but then I remember I have hope.  I have hope that I will see him again in Heaven. 

So while I am waiting here on Earth I need people to continue to share all the things I mentioned above because it is your joy and happiness that makes me remember why it is so worth it to be completely resistless and wide open with our love for others.         

2 comments:

  1. That’s beautiful, Casey! And thank you for sharing. For those of us that have been lucky enough not to personally experience such a profound loss, it can be confusing how to navigate the topic of a lost loved one. It is so truly YOU to be helping others process and understand a bit more about that instead of solely focusing on your own pain. Thanks, friend!

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  2. Thank you! If I can walk alongside others through this I know the aftermath of losing Charlie can be full of blessings.

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